Dr. Ronnie's Column of Agony

From the hearts of darkness comes a white coated God, whose healing hands can assuage even the most unfortunate of symptoms...

Identify the symptom which best suits, and using the power of metal he will diagnose your problem and proffer his poetic advice..

 I can't read..?
 My girlfriend left me for a monkey..?
 Elephantisis of the nazum..?
 Socially retarded and hideously ugly..?


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